Today I had very little to do. It is the last week of classes here at MSU and, as a last semester senior with only 5 class sessions to attend this entire week, I was set to retire to my dorm room. It is still raining here and has shown no signs of stopping any time soon, and my little sanctuary sounded like the perfect remedy from the rainy day blues.
I worked the better portion of the day on letters, planning, and phone calls. I then decided to sit down to a solid hour ad a half in the Word.
Let me clarify that I have been very distant in my time alone with God lately. It has seemed that going through the motions was the best description. It is an interesting issue when you can see that something is wrong,and diagnose the problem, but, in the end, can truly see no change in the problem itself. I have spent the better part of the last week and half waiting.....waiting for something to change, and doing all I know to. Asking the Father himself to accept the atoning payment of Christ for my sin, and being thankful that, despite my shortcomings and inability to draw myself back up, my salvation is sealed.
That brings me back to today....Today was the day, I was going to sit with my Lord and not get up until I had heard intimately from Him. I was about 3 minutes into a Bible study I am doing when my phone vibrated. (Let me add that I usually do not check my phone during this time, but today, I did.)
It was my discipleship group leader. The text read, "Do you all (my best friend/ roommate Kirby, and I) remember that you are supposed to be teaching on an attribute of God tonight when we meet?" I immediately hollered at Kirby through the wall that divides our rooms. She scurried in and we both set to work. I was totally frustrated. I guess my intimacy issue was going to have to wait another day, because today, I had to teach.
After about 2 minutes of brainstorming, I pulled out the book The God You Can Know...... How ironic! If He is so easy to know, why would I be feeling the way I am? We stumbled onto a page that brought up God's patience, and were both intrigued.
I am sure you can see where this is going. As I pulled out my concordance and we began to explore this attribute I was reminded of Noah.....God flooded his town too, along with the whole world. But, God waited a LONG time before doing it. And, He sent Noah to warn the people. He even had Noah build a boat so big that it would have been his life's work. God was patient with the people who lived during Noah's day.
I was then reminded of the way the Israelites turned from God again and again when they were in the wilderness. Those same Israelites had once been so close to Him. They had even seen Him part the sea...and they still turned away. Yet, again and again God would patiently remind them, "I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt..."
Psalm 145 tells us he is patient, as well as Nahum 1:3....We know that in the old testament, God ALWAYS sent a prophet to warn the people, and to explain to them the reasoning why BEFORE he punished or judged them. He always gave them ample time to repent.
We then turn to the New Testament where 1 Peter 3:20 and 1 Tim. 1:16 tells us of the patience of the Son of God.....His patience to remain on the cross, His patience to continue to call us to follow Him during His time on Earth, even His patience as He cried out, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."
My concordance then called me to James 5:7-10.....reminding me that life is not about those seasons when I feel most deeply the presence of God or see most clearly the messages He is sending me. No, life takes patience, patience that mirrors His. Patience that will suffer any let down, patience that will not consider self, patience that will wait. Patience that will wait as He did for me to turn from living for my self, and follow Him. Patience that warned me time and time again that I was facing a judgement unless I repented. Patience that remained on a cross to pay the price for me.
Thank goodness He is a God of patience...and thank goodness that, as James tells us, our life should be lived patiently waiting a GREATER prize than anything we can gain here on Earth.
